I like rattlesnakes. They’re a beautiful, shy and reclusive creature that is generally non-threatening. They tend to be pretty docile and non-aggressive. They just want to be left alone to do their thing. Eating rodents. My favorite animal. I named this blog after them.
Rattlesnakes get a bad rap. A lot of myths and tall tales have grown around them. You’ve no doubt heard that they travel in pairs, and if you kill one it’s mate will hunt you down and kill you. What a crock. My favorite one though is the tale of the 15 foot Mojave that chased down a tractor and punctured it’s tire. It seems everyone’s grandfather was there to see this. Everybody’s grandfather but mine apparently. But has anyone who passes this bullshit along really thought about it? Snakes aren’t aggressive and don’t chase things down. Especially something they can’t eat. A full grown Mojave doesn’t grow to more than about 4 feet – the biggest ever recorded was 51 inches. Granted that’s a big snake, but it’s a far cry from 15 feet. And has anybody stopped to think about how thick and heavy a tractor tire is? It’s hard to pound a nail through one. A snake’s fangs aren’t gonna puncture it. Not even a 15 footer.
We have two kinds of rattlesnakes here in my part of the desert. The Western Diamondback which can grow to about 6 feet, and the Colorado Desert Sidewinder. A full-grown one seldom gets bigger than about 2 feet. I see both kinds, but seldom.
When you see a sidewinder it’s usually curled up in a small ball like the one in the picture. You can walk to within a couple of feet of them and they don’t even twitch. You can toss small rocks toward them and they ignore it. They think they’re invisible. But nudge it with a stick or pole and all hell will break loose and you’d better back away. They don’t like that. I know, I’ve tried.
The biggest diamondback I’ve seen was coiled up under a bush. It was mid March and I wasn’t expecting to see any yet. I got within about 3 feet of the bush and I heard a strong warning rattle. Nothing I know of rivets your attention like a warning buzz from a diamondback. I did a quick two-step away and looked. There he was, about a third of his body raised and his head forward in a strike pose. About a foot and a half of his body was raised, the rest was still coiled, so I estimated he was about 5 feet long. I stepped back and he relaxed, but still watchful. I took a couple steps forward again and he instantly assumed his strike pose with tail rattling. I backed off, and he relaxed again. We did this dance a couple of times and he apparently decided I really wasn’t a threat and curled back up and paid no attention to me. I circled the bush and saw there was a second one in there, smaller, maybe 4 feet that hadn’t moved. Probably a female he was mating with, so I left them to have at it and moved on.
I’m pretty well convinced that you almost have to try to get bitten by a rattlesnake. Almost. You have to either be careless, or do something stupid. Yes people get bitten occasionally, but it’s usually from not paying attention and getting too close. Most bites are the result of sheer stupidity though. Some macho shithead, drunked up, will want to show how tough he is and try to pick one up. He loses. In short, if you’re in snake country keep your eyes open. If you see (or hear) a rattlesnake back off a few feet and you’ll be fine. They’re not out to get you. Thank them for doing such a fine job of keeping rodent populations in check and go on your merry way. And be sure to say hi for me.
buzztail 